007 Nightfire Friendly · 142 days ago

Historically, most videogames based on movies suck balls. In 1997 that trend took a sharp turn when Rare games introduced one of the first ever multiplayer first person shooters for a console system, which also happened to be based on the first Pierce Brosnan version of the James Bond 007 film: Goldeneye. We could say that the unpredictable success that was to come of this film-game was based on the simple fact that nintendo had insisted on adding a total of 4 controllers to the new Nintendo 64 system, which brought console gaming up to speed with what computer games had already developing for some time. Many a nights in ’97 were spent til 4am with my brothers and I grinding out battles in real time amid the toilet stalls of the facility. Goldeneye64 was an unforgettable game.

Fast forward to 2010. Eurocom releases a bolstered remake of Goldeneye starring Daniel Craig instead of Pierce Brosnan. Although updated graphics and responsive controls make this game a strong title for new generation gamers, for someone like myself trying to create that 4am feeling of 1997, this game falls miserably short in the fun factor area, making it one of the greatest letdowns and certainly anti climactic time wasters in the annals of video game history. So its no surprise that 2 days after buying this game, I turned back to what I felt was the legitimate successor of the 007 franchise: an unexpected classic: 007 Nightfire.

Originally released in 2002 on Nintendo Gamecube, Xbox, PS2 and PC platforms, 007: Nightfire was understandably invisible next to the juggernauts of FPS games of its time, dominated mostly by PC gamers. As time went by, however; gamers realized a sort of special quality to Nightfire’s multiplayer mode. 10 years later: there it sits on every shelf for every console in almost any game store you enter, and still making money. To try and revisit Goldeneye 64 is frustrating by 2012 standards, without the ability to even jump, the grudgingly slow refresh rate and overall sluggish movement of the characters, makes this classic (while still funner than the remake) almost unplayable. Nightfire is quite the opposite! You find levels such as skyrail and ravine very in-line with twitchy shooters to be released around the same time like Wolfenstein and Quake. The innovative weapons and AI control also reminiscent of Perfect Dark (recently re-released btw) and Turok. Even games like Modern Warfare have taken the concepts of drone helicopters like we see in Nightfire and expanded the idea to what is now the standard in FPS games. This game has its heap of problems too: AI, even for the time period, were still very undeveloped almost to a pathetic degree, glitches galore exist throughout the game, and an certain oversights leave the weapons and gadgets in this game EXTREMELY unbalanced. Although obvious lag still occurs regularly in multiplayer mode, and granted: the single player campaign operates like a dollar store computer disk for toddlers. But in terms of downright “fun” 007: Nightfire joins the ranks of Halo, Counterstrike, Star Wars: Battlefront and Quake as one of the greatest multiplayer games ever created.

So a few of my friends got together and decided that for the 10 year anniversary of 007: Nightfire we would dust off the old consoles and spend a few weeks brushing up on the controls and have a little friendly tournament. Thus the very first 007 Nightfire Friendly was born.

Rules and info:

This event will take place in a meeting room at the Salt Lake City Downtown Library on February 2nd 2012 to start at or around 5pm. There are 3 technical categories, 1 Player Bot Dispute (Team Arena vs Bots), 2 Player Deathmatch (Team Arena), and 4 Player Split Screen Deathmatch (Arena), the rules of each which are found in the paragraphs to follow, changes to certain rules will require a majority vote among participants, final decisions determined by the master of ceremonies. We want to explore the imbalanced functions of this game, and therefore will be allowing certain options and cheats, but we also want to make this a fun and competitive event for everyone so we are allowing each match to be altered mildly accordingly by the participants given the approval of the MC. This is a free event open to the public but limited competitor slots are available to first 12 people. First come, first serve. To guarantee entry send an email by febrary 1st to jgreathouse1 at gmail.com. All players must compete in a rank determining 1 player qualifying match before participating in multiplayer deathmatches. In any multiplayer matchup, the player with the highest rank is considered the “Home” and the challenging player with the lower rank considered “Visitor”, in the event of any tie, a coin toss will determine the winner.

All Divisions:

RADAR: OFF
AUTO-AIM: OFF
LOCATION DMG: ON
FRIENDLY FIRE: ON

SINGLE PLAYER BOT DISPUTE (all consoles):
Team Arena

GRAPPLING: OFF

All Characters
All Cheats
Respawn: Random
Drones: Random
10 Mins
50 Kills

The objective of a bot dispute match, is for a player to create a bot or team of bots that they themselves can kill, but their opponent cannot. Home player picks the bot team (1-4 bots) for visitor to fight, also picks the level, visitor picks the weapons used. Visitor gets 10 minutes to rack up as many kills as possible, then at the end of the match passes to the Home player (unless their are 2 systems available in which case players will compete simultaneously) who will try to get a greater number of kills using the same settings as the home player (with the exception of control scheme). The default console for this division is Playstation 2, and all console versions are welcome, however; if a player wishes to compete on a different console version they should bring their own equipment.

Scoring: each Bot dispute match victory is worth 1 point.

4 PLAYER SPLIT SCREEN DEATHMATCH (PS2):

ARENA

All levels
Main Characters Only
All Cheats
Gun placements: Random
Drones: Random
Respawn: Random
Explosive scenery: ON
10 Mins
50 Kills

Characters are chosen in order according to rank.

The objective of a split screen deathmatch is to kill as many other players as possible in a ten minute time period. Home player picks the level, visitor (the next highest ranking player) picks the weapons. In case of a tie the winner will be the player with the least amount of deaths. If no clear winner is still decided, the highest ranking player wins by default. Players of equal rank, deaths and kills will simply coin toss to decide the winner.

Scoring: Each Split Screen Deathmatch victory is worth 1 point.
If a player reaches 50 kills before the 10 minute time period, he/she is awarded a free restart to be used in any future 4 player deathmatch.

2 Player Split Screen Deathmatch (PS2):

Team Arena

All levels
All characters
All Cheats
Gun placements: Random
Drones: Random
Respawn: Random
Explosive scenery: ON
10 Mins
25 Kills

Characters are chosen in order according to rank.

Scoring: each 2 player deathmatch victory is worth 1 point.
If a player reaches 25 kills before the 10 minute time period, he/she is awarded a free restart to be used in any future 2 player deathmatch.

Overall Scoring:

The player with the most amount of match points wins. In the case of a tie: the player with the highest kill per game average wins (rounding down to the nearest tenth if necessary).

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VCR5 - Heavy Weapons & Fresh Flute · 181 days ago

Here’s a exclusive sneak peek at the upcoming 2012 VCR5 full length DVD H.Weapons

http://youtu.be/iiAEmeIL7kc

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Form of Rocket to Reunite in 2011 · 312 days ago

“FOR” Brings it Back this Fall

Its confirmed, Form of Rocket is again suiting up for battle. I first met Gentry Densley playing the Ukele at a mutual friend’s house. I met Peter Makowski over the phone as he tried to buy my enriched Pink Floyd collection on vinyl (which fell through, i dont remember why). I met Ben Dodds at a Thrones concert with his friend and bandmate Sebastian. These are powerful men of music floating around unchained in Salt Lake like zombie dobermans, along with Tyler Smith and Curtis Jensen, because they comprise the significant indie-hardcore band Form of Rocket. For reasons unknown “FOR” disintrigrated around 2007 after their last known release “Men” its foldouts and cover artwork drawn by real inmates at a local jail where Gentry has roots, not as a resident but as the site librarian. Ben and Peter broke off and started Accidente, Tyler and Gentry went on to become Eagle Twin. Gentry, commonly believed to be the native guitarist of FOR, was preceded by Curtis Jensen, who before Gentry did vocals AND guitar. Gentry and Curtis will be in the center of the frying pan once again this fall when Form of Rocket Reunites to rekindle the fire started a decade ago when Kilby Court put on its very first concert (we call them shows now). Although Form of Rocket encountered different setups, this enterpretation will pickup where they left off 3 years ago with Curtis the frontman and cowbell, Peter on vocals and guitar, Ben on bass, Gentry on guitar and Tyler on drums. My penis just moved. While the bandmembers refuse to discuss details; Salt Lake City can be assured at least one incredible reunion show, and possibly an all ages show.

^{If you grew up playing music in Utah you know Kilby Court all too well}

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Timelords of Acid · 630 days ago

Nolens Volens – Real (TIME CAPSULE RMX) by vcr5

Time Capsule is a group of like minded reptilians from Salt Lake City who got together between spring and summer of 2010 in musical jest, creating a compilation of “Timeless” midi classics. For the average joe: midi refers to an ancient but powerful musical code. This Balrog awoken when summoned for Time Capsule’s first release on 3.5” floppy disk, a mere 170 kb file size. While restarting the midi hits factory was an interesting idea, laments producer Joe Greathouse “the accessibility of mp3s and CDs was too big a deal to neglect” which led to the creation of a 16bit stereo companion remix CD called “Timelords.”

The remixes, unlike the sister floppy disk “volume I” are not in midi format. “This project required a bit of re-hashing out notes and chords by ear” says Greathouse “You cant really take a format like midi and VOILA! convert it to a hi-fi stereo music file” however; this is just the kind of problem midi is designed to reconcile.

The Time Capsule open-forum concept caters to tracking proghrammers and midi device junkies in a distinct, orchestral “mode”. “Its a thing Andrew (nolens volens) brought up one day (which is) to make conscious, music that we feel to be ‘timeless’. The sound is instrumental, anthemic, and sometimes with a southwestern coolness. A mockery of classical, drum and bass, brass, strings, electric “oohs” and “aahs” all falling within the bounding box of andrew’s “timeless” formula.

Also among the motley crew of krononauts is Greg Midgley, aka Timechimp, a simian from a technologically advanced universe who finds himself precariously lost in time. Michael Biggs also contributed, among others, in ways indistinguishable by ear. While most tracks were composed in Cubase using note editors, Boggs’ track “blue rocket” was composed in real-time using Logic software and a midi keyboard. Greathouse explains their first meeting when Biggs showed up one night to see his own band, VCR5 perform in the basement of a bookstore. “I didnt know him but I knew he was in TOBC so when i saw him in the crowd I was like ‘damn! I better step up me game!’”

Tmelords and Time Capsule Volume I are both free to download from Billygoatdatabase.com. To submit Time Capsule remixes or for more information contact Joe Greathouse by email Jgreathouse1 at Gmail.com

Time Capsule 2010 is a collaborative project consisting of 5 musicians from various disciplines, all brought together to create a meaningful dispensation of modern midi music. This first installment features: Michael Biggs (A-Star Recordings), Timechimp, Nolens Volens (MSSV), VCR5, and Dinky. Available for purchase on September 26th 2010 on individual or compilation floppy disk. (click the links below to download individual free sampler tracks)

01 Timechimp – Welcome Travelers
02 VCR5 – How To Make Bombs
03 Nolens Volens – Real
04 Michael Biggs – Blue Rocket
05 Dinky and the Tinkers – Dragonspeak

For more information on this and other progressive music in Salt Lake City please visit http://www.billygoatdatabase.com

_{by Joe Greathouse}

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Exumbrella Records · 633 days ago

1h86335/VCR5 – EXUM010 – Static wash’n’drone meets gritty drum’n’bass. Most of these tracks date back to the 2003-2007 time period. Available as Radiohead IN RAINBOWS pay what you like format for limited time only

— click the link below for download.

1h86335/VCR5 DOWNLOAD <— CLICK HERE

send questions/comments to albacoretuner@gmail.com

01 – 1h86335 – Greenland (4:36)
02 – 1h86335 – Paramedics Buzzkill (5:44)
03 – 1h86335 – A Sudden Change in Gravity (5:27)
04 – 1h86335 – China Meadow (TRB Sourcecode) (2:11)
05 – 1h86335 – Antarctica (3:25)
06 – 1h86335 – Pterodactyl (Paper Cranes Rmx) (3:06)
07 – 1h86335 – CONGRATSGAMEOVER (0:36)
08 – VCR5 – Press Start (2:47)
09 – VCR5 – Kenny G Jelly Roll (2:39)
10 – VCR5 – Hard Start (3:59)
11 – VCR5 – Crossfire (5:16)
12 – VCR5 – Warriors (2:51)
13 – VCR5 – MUD (feat. Tinman) (3:49)

htttp://www.exumbrellarecords.com

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Gavin's Struggle to Remain Interesting · 694 days ago

Utah’s Gayest Bar No Longer a Secret

^{my sister made this badboy in Broderbund’s Paint Shop Pro or something}

With my pimphand strong from constant stroking of the scene’s metaphorical wiener, I forwarded that out of town promoter’s suggestions and ideas to the trashbin with an enthusiastic “Click.” After a close call while investigating the local underground scene, however; I decided to travel the path of least resistance. I was accosted in a local underground parking lot (ironically) by Asian gang members, they had katana blades, I think they were Asian. “THAT’S SO RAVEN!” I screamed as they cut me to near ribbons with their locally made and manufactured blades and later refusing to be interviewed. Local underground enthusiasts like these don’t seem to understand the unlimited local power of the underground Gavinverse. Sometimes, as I gaze at my reflection during my semi-weekly shave, transforming myself into an Esper, soaring above the cities underground, I search. Combing the shadows for that one groundbreaking, out of control interview. As I look to the West I see the rescinding flames of dusk, the phoenix rising from daylights fallen embers beyond the vanity, and from it’s ashes: A shaving lubricant locally known as “Barbasol.”

Gavin: Barbasol, you have been in the local shaving scene for some time now, but were manufactured in Dublin, Ohio. You appeared in several commercials in the late nineties, and even sister Dottie Dixon, a local alternative celebrity faux character from the underground scene in Salt Lake City’s underground nightlife elite makes numerous references to your connection with the LDS alternative contempory underground missionary scene. Tell us a little about that?

BBS: Beard Buster BARBASOL, thick & rich shaving cream. Original.

Gavin: So how is it you came to be such a household name in the Utah local shaving scene?

BBS: Barbasol Original Shave Cream’s rich, thick lather moisturizes and lubricates even the toughest beard for a clean, close, comfortable shave. Its special formula and quality ingredients make Barbasol Beard Buster America’s premium shave cream.

Gavin: If you remember our last blog interview what seems like forever ago, well in retrospect I think its safe to say that you were struggling under the pressure, is that right?

BBS: Contents under pressure. Do not puncture or incinerate. Do not heat for warm lather or any other purpose. Do not keep where temperature will exceed 110 degrees. Keep out of reach of children.

Gavin: Ha ha, Oh we will. Do you have any other advice for the readers out there in the local Utah underground nightlife shaving and alternative missionary buzzword web jazz producer bicycle scene who are interested in a close, comfortable shave?

BBS: Wash face with warm water. Leave Wet. 2. Shake can and hold upright. 3. Press top to release lather. For best results use gentle strokes with a sharp razor to avoid irritation. Rinse the blade often during shaving.

Gavin: Anything else you want to plug?

BBS: www.barbasol.com

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NUMBS, Mark Dago, The Womp Rats · 702 days ago

The World

Earthburn Records 2010 Music Sampler

Numbs certainly have extended their roots in Utah, and hip-hop in general. I received the new Earthburn Music’s “The World” tarot disc in the mail the other day which, much to my delight, contained not only samples of the forthcoming new 2010 Numbs album, but two equally exciting spin-off groups with the same Numbs members (Shanty, Mark Dago, Gunner, and Rooster) we’ve come to know and respek! The two new projects “Mark Dago” and “Womp Rats” satiate a geek’s need for innovative concepts, littered with Star Wars references, 8-bit plugins and digital delay. Shawn Murphy (Shanty) seems to take more of a producer role in 2010, and his pro activeness is audibly missing on all three projects. So was this a good listen, or more of the same ol’ shiz from these Provo boys? Keep reading to find out.

Numbs in 2010 is all about wild west references and 4/4 breaks being prevalent but not outstanding.Although the overall flow seems sluggish, much of the topical fleetiness and tangents present on previous albums gives way to concise utilitarian conversation. There seems to be a mental calm and wise demeanor worn on all 3 Mc’s (could it be because they are pushing 30+ years old?) in this album. Each song contains its own unique theme: one is dub-oriented, the other is true hip-hop. The bond holding each beat together is…FUNK?! I find that interesting for some reason. This new format seems to encompass just enough progressiveness to enhance a very solid, very present Numbs foundation of extremely positive, extremely real microphone mechanics. I hope and expect that will never change. Its clear that on this newest Numbs creation that both MCs and beatsmiths are mindful of both new and old fans of Numbs, as well as aging hip-hop purists in general.

Mark Dago’s solo stuff is much more innovative and melodic than Numbs. I’m glad its been isolated to its own project too, especially since the very first song “Get Steady” illustrates the difficulties in trying to fuse his unique cadence with melodic beats. The scale and progression on this one song conflicts disastrously with the natural pitch of Dago’s voice. Otherwise: great stuff, but its a pretty big problem for an opening track for a brand new project. “Alright” is a perfect example of how a carefully chosen melody can mate well Dago’s cyclic tones, almost the exact opposite of the “Get Steady” result. Lyrically speaking: Dago’s is a passionate MC with obvious New Jersey ties but willfully acknowledges his preference for the worker bee, western mindset. He’s very real and fun, the kind of MC everyone wants to collaborate with.

Womp Rats is an concoction of Numbs gabber and Shanty’s “Aerotank” period, in which he explores the world of digital beats and riffs. I daresay this might be the first documented Shanty experimental hip-hop we’ve ever heard. Sadly, the track “Superrats” might be the only noteworthy track on this, what seemed a quickly thrown together section of the sampler, but somehow I can see how its effectiveness at getting people excited to hear the full album when it drops this winter.

That’s kind of what I’m feeling overall from earthburn, they’ve teased just enough with this sampler to get me excited about at least some of what their doing. What comes out of the speaker is undeniable progress, be it slow. Numbs have been around and in the zone for some time now, and although I’m hearing good things, when measured against their earlier albums with Gabe Martinez there’s not a whole lot of change to speak of, in some ways they’ve even gone backwards. When they do try to shake things up like on their 2007 release Nfinity, disaster strikes. So now every member of the group has their own pet project and avenue for growth, while Numbs keeps doing what they’ve done from day one, but doing it better one day and one positive message at a time.

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Warsampler · 802 days ago

This article contains basic principles and applications of the warsampler keyboard and Warriorbox sampler software. If you are already familiar with the warsampler, and want to get started by downloading the free software click here. If you are a musician and you wish to contribute samples and/or keyboard configurations to the newest version of Warriorbox, contact saltlakemusic.com at gmail.com. If you wish to submit a warriorbox version 1 feat Cloud Warrior remix click here.

The warsampler is useful in that it adds physical manipulation to otherwise intangible software. It requires separate production of the samples, whereas traditional samplers can record and play. That doesnt mean this device cant write music, but because it requires ready made samples it becomes less convenient than some other devices. Finally: the Warsampler is composed of everyday materials, costing virtually nothing.

Warriorbox software is the simplest form of Warsampler usage. Written in a scripting language originally created in Delphi, Mac users will need a Windows emulator to run it. When you open the program your keyboard becomes a sample trigger. In the window header you will see “Config A”, in this mode the samples have been arranged for optimal finger manipulation and looping. Pressing pageup/pagedown will toggle “Config B”. In this mode the samples are arranged ontologically, and are all one-shots. To play sample(s) without holding down the key: simply start the sample, making note of the letter or #, and then change modes while it is still playing. To end the sample, simply press and release the same key again in the appropriate mode.

Freestyle by vcr5

Although laptops are ideal consoles to run Warsampler software, laptop keyboards are confined and less percussive than their desktop counterparts. Even many new desktop keyboards will limit the number of samples that can be played at one time, therefore; older keyboards with responsive keys tend to work best for beginners. When you become comfortable with one type of keyboard surface, try another. Try different elevations, sitting and standing. Employ straps, harnesses and stands if necessary, this will help you develop a style of your very own.

to download warriorbox 1.0 click here

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Hulk vs The Incredible Hulk · 943 days ago

Jennifer Connely the movie vs Liv Tyler the movie. Better yet, who could calm down Hulk quicker in a giant green penis eating contest? In this review we take a traditional comic book nerd stance against two of Marvel’s most successful films, and try to figure out ultimately what might happen in the Hulk tried to have sex with scientist Betty. The results might amaze you. Hulk (2003) was a highly decorated film nominated for 8 Academy Awards (i hear those are worth like tens of dollars). With a lineup of Danny Elfman, Jennifer Connely, Jennifer Connely and Jennifer Connely. This movie can seemingly not lose. Then five years later a much more pragmatic take, the Incredible Hulk (2008) raised the bar for comic book films yet again, with a dynamic story arc reminiscent of the first but clearly standing free of aesthetic style and even physics of the first. Stay with me.

Hulk (2003)

In this movie scientist Dr. Bruce Kirschner or something (Eric Bana), leads a team of contracted pioneer scientists in NOT battlefield applications, but “practical” applications of a special artificial enzyme called “nanomedz”. Nanomeds are stupid, and nobody thought that through, but it sounded really cool at one time…ok moving on. His girlfriend and co-scientist and super fucking sexy Jennifer Connely um, Betty, struggle to meet a deadline to prove to their constituates that their petmedz can help heal lizards and goats and shit, i dunno. They are doing science stuff and computer images are flashing and shit goes down and of course, Bruce Kirschner or whatever his name is, rushes in to help and for some reason feels compelled to take the brunt of the gamma rays to try and save his buddy, who doesnt even thank him. His friend and several other so-called friends kindof float in and out of the first half hour of the picture doing sciency stuff that my buddy Brian probably knows all about but i have no idea…but it looks way cool.

Bruce somehow survives the accident, somehow the petmedz worked and they helped heal him, even though fucking sexy Dr. Betty cries and shes like “but they have killed everything we used them on” or something, damn she’s stupid, i love it. For a scientist, Dr. Science lady walks REALLY REALLY slow. She also wears high heels at the lab which is cool too, come to think about it she really isnt essential to this part of the story whatsoever, anywho. Eventually we discover that Bruce Kirschner is actually the JANITORS SON! (Nick Nolte) David Banner reveals himself. He’s been sifting his once adopted sons trash and trying to recreate his work at home on poodles and pitbulls using a bong and a broken glowstick. It worked tho, you gotta hand it to him he’s a crazy ol bastard.

^{Eric Bana’s eyes get real big in this film and he makes these awesome pouty face, angry face, pouty face, angry face excersizes (see below)}

to save another paragraph lets just say Nick Nolte plays a great Nick Nolte and Sam Elliot plays a good Sam Elliot, eventually maybe or maybe not gets killed by Hulk, no spoilers in this bitch yet. Hulk is a good interpretation of the comics, but not only that, a good enterpretation of comic book graphic styles in general. Whats really unique about Hulk is that it explores the character of Hulk as a psychic being, something only few comic writers bothered exploring, but Ang Lee was able to communicate volumes in a single dream sequence quite effectively. The patchwork of the story is pretty sad, evident when the Hulk starts dreaming and in the dream is David Banner. Its not meant to make sense really, and its a pretty easy story with rather simple characters, and the film makers really managed not to fuck with a good thing when they made this one.

The Incredible Hulk (2008)

This film takes place in a separate reality from the first, but 3-5 years later from the timeline indicated in the first film. In this film Bruce Banner (Ed Norton) has escaped Betty’s Dad, General Ross, and fleed to Brazil where he works in a bottling company. We quickly see some foreshadowing as Bruce sits during the opening credits in Jui-Jitsu class, trying some breathing excersizes, monitoring his heart rate. He communicates with an anonymous “Mr. Blue” on the interweb, trying to find a cure for his gamma radiation problem (which we know very little about), under the alias “Mr. Green” get ready because this film is chuck full of Hulk anecdotes, everything from the “Youre making me angry” puns to the stretchy pants physical comedy, the rule is as follows: if it doesnt cost money, we’ll put it in the film. Ross tracks him down after some of his blood falls in a soda pop (gross and Stan Lee drinks it) they dont bother explaining how they are able to track him down from the soda, but Liv Tyler is in this and, per my opinion, her breasts are immaculate butterface reminds me of Steven “Burnt Lips” Tyler. I’m shallow, moving on.

Ross forms a special team of disposal army guys to go in and get their asses kicked by Bruce Banner because he’s old and incompetent and Ahab-esque. All he wants to do is to use more of Bruce Banner’s soda pop blood to create an army of indestructable angry killers. Thats all. But Bruce is bein stingy and makes his way back to the US to try and cure himself, and in the process runs in to his old lab partner sexy as hell Betty herself. Much more is explored between said lovers, and Bruce Even tries to insert weiner here but retracts when his weiner alarm reaches critical levels. What a dumbass, split her in half she’ll dig it! I kid I kid. But no really it would be a one-time dream come true before she drowned in green goo 45 seconds later.

So to save another paragraph, Tim Roth plays the predecessor to Abomination, melo-ridiculously over ambitious Emyl Bronski, one of Hulk’s lamer adversaries. Bringing the only glimmer of respectable acting in the film, but consequently spends as much time being animated, and far less present, than Edward Norton, Roth gets an A+ in special Ed (see Liev Schriber in XMen Origins: Wolverine, for parallels). He also brings to the table a posture and upper build like a jewish boy with skoliosis, even after spraypaint is applied. I will venture to say they could not have casted a better actor for such a terrible role. I take it back. If they wouldve casted Ian McKellan as Ed Bronski then it would have been what i just said.

The Truth about Jennifer Connely being so fucking sexy

Why couldnt Eric Bana hulk try that same funky biznass with Jennifer Connely Betty? Eric Bana hulk was actually cattle prodded and punched in the face by wormy army guy Talbot to the point of unconsciousness, and Eric Bana Hulk just refuses to change. Ed Norton Hulk takes 22 hour naps because he’s so scared he might raise his heart levels. Theres alot that goes on to a character when one comic book writer takes on the mantle of another writer, certain implications exist and you have to be sensitive to those. While its understandable that certain concepts are fun to tweak and/or even destroy, there are certain qualities we already expect from the comic book or cartoon hulk. In this regard, both movies are only slightly guilty of said liberties, and notably so for us comic book nerds.

Eric Bana Hulk recieved a genetic mutation from his father, a result of testing the same dangerous gamma radiation experiments 30 years earlier on himself. Not until he is injected with the Nanomedz is his power realized. The unique ability to absorb gamma rays allows his petmedz to become active without killing him. Edward Norton Hulk may or may not be trying to cure this same aforementioned “nanomedz” but instead trying to cure himself of the mutation his father gave him maybe? Neither film does a good job of going beyond the “lab experiment gone wrong” superhero scenario. And so what? Its supposed to be Dr. Jeckyl and Mr. Hyde.

Speaking of which, Eric Bana Hulk portrays a much deeper, more complicated “Hulk scenario” in which it is explained by nurse hot as fuck that the nanomedz are causing the transformation as a result of trying to heal “emotional” scars. While making little or no sense its an interesting twist, and a noble but failed attempt at transfering a difficult comic book concept onto the screen. Similar failed attempts occur in Edward Norton’s Hulk, as Bruce Banner tries ever cheesily to walk the streets a lone walker man, hiding his face behind a baseball cap. I’ve seen good films with Ed Norton but he’s just too pretty to pull this off. The kindof grimey street walking scientist Bruce Banner turns into comes off as a spoiled, paranoid tourist at best, and just has too much energy and not enough cool.

Eric Bana Hulk has several levels of angriness: pissed, pissed off, and whoa that dude is so pissed. Each time he gets angrier he grows by another 50% or so, and seems to have more and more power in every imagineable way. This fulfills the fundamental Hulk theology in which the only way to beat him is to stop pissing him off. Ed Norton Hulk better fulfills the Mr. Hyde theory in the sense that Banner does NOT enjoy the transformation, and wants to destroy it altogether, becoming his own worst enemy. This is in opposition to the Eric Bana Hulk, which hates the transformation but loves the feeling of power, which satisfies a very abstract but still psychological presense.

While the dogma might be fundamentally different, the stories run along side eachother quite well, in a circle that leads nowhere fast. In both films the Hulk finds himself a god in a world where the only person who can stop him is his girlfriend, and this is where the audience can feel the psychology, the so called turmoil. Kudos to Eric Bana for giving it a good run with the tortured damaged scientist smartass. Whereas Edward Norton pretty much just…plays a good Edward Norton. After two films its hard to expect anything more than some elastic Eric Bana faces or Ed Norton casuality, and certainly some disposable badguy that flickers in and out of the story, from the next.

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